The Winner Takes It All… January 31, 2010

I’ve been following the Australian Open over the last 2 weeks…why not? when it’s streamed live on TV. Last Sunday was special too as the whole family went to our yearly pilgrimage to watch the 4th Round matches…but this time even more special with our youngest Iz who joined us and was old enough to enjoy it (and mind you, was a good little boy as he sat very quietly…well, as quiet as he could).

When you watch such high standard being pushed out there on the tennis courts, you kinda sense that there is so much competitiveness and practically no room for error. As a “Coach” (no pun intended and unrelated to the sport…hehe) I have also learned so much just observing the professional players in, out and during the game. Some just lose their cool, others flare up with the lines-person, still some talk to themselves, others just shake their heads in disgust, another would throw their racket, whilst others pump their fists for encouragement or just keep calm…and sadly a few just look up at their support/coach box hoping for some glimmer of help/coaching!

Sounds familiar doesn’t it? Yes…this also happens in our daily lives when you think about it. And if these great players have “coaches” as Professionals…shouldn’t you have a “coach” for yourself in the more important GAME-OF-LIFE? I guess if you do consider yourself a Professional in the field that you are in…

• either when Transitioning on an Important Decision/Challenge, or
  
• just wanting a New Perspective (in Life or Work) or
• desiring to Unlock your Potential by Living your Dream/Passion or
• perhaps wanting Clarity of Mind and Heart

…you ought to have a Coach too! Shouldn’t you?

Watching yesterday’s game between Andy Murray against the smooth Swiss Robot-Champ…I could instantly conclude that one of the key factors for continuous success in the Fed’s Camp could be the ever evidence of a Great Entourage of Support. But possibly something that everyone might have forgotten was “who was Federer’s Coach?” back in 2005…that eventually helped him to secure the skills to win the elusive French Open. I’ll tell you, it was Coach Andy Roche (the Aussie!) and a Great one at that too! He also coached Ivan Lendl and Lleyton Hewitt too.

So do you also want to WIN in the race of Life? Hire a Coach today…because it is a very competitive market out there and you will want to Invest in the most important ASSET in your life…YOU! And the saying is true, the Winner ‘does’ take it all!

It’s the end of Jan 2010 already…but not to worry, you have 11 months to go. It’s not too late to live this New Year without regrets and just going for it.

Take Action Today…connect with me and receive a Complimentary “25min Laser Coaching” session (on Skype)…I promise you…you won’t regret it!

In support and success

Coach Mel (skype: lifecoachmel)

1300-90-DAYS (3297) or +61413441171

mel@miprofessionals.com.au

Dramatic End to the Year! December 31, 2009

Today is the final day of the year…WOW, how time flies…we are at Docklands in Melbourne and just hours away to enjoying a lovely time watching the New Year’s Eve Fireworks! We have been blessed having an apartment to stay over the last few days in the city…as we house sit for friends who are at Missions in Cambodia. We are also praying along with them that God will move and touch the many young people of Cambodia.

Today as we were going out for an outing, something dramatic happened. My youngest boy Izrael was singing and dancing (as he usually is)…and he accidentally took a wrong jump/turn and landed with his mouth hitting the top of the coffee table. My wife was shouting as she was the first to see the deep cut/open gash that was just oozing out with blood. I quickly reached out for him and applied pressure with some tissue. We then knew that this little accident needed more than just a band-aid attention.  We both shouted to our other children…”We need to rush to the Hospital”…it was rather dramatic and we began praying and I rushed the whole family into the car and headed to the nearest hospital. For those who know us…not to worry…Iz is great now, shaken but well…with “DERMAGlue” (thanks to Medical Innovation that replaces stitches) used to seal the deep cut.

Why am I sharing this story? And how does this story become a lesson and insight for us all in the last day of the New Year? Well…we can plan our day or life…but a dramatic twist or an unplanned event (even with the GFC for many) will and can come in to alter our Priorities of the day or a season! What are some of your plans for this coming year? Do make sure that you plan for some kinda Contingency…or possible Risks that could come and change your outcomes.

Don’t get me wrong planning is great and I’m all for that, I always ask my Clients to Prioritize and Plan but always make room for Changes along the way. When you are ready and accept that Changes are a Natural Process of anything we do, you will be more open to accept and receive it…lest you get caught off-guard. Of course you can’t prepare for every possible risk…but being vigilant is better than not.

Also remember, that behind any “Crisis” there is Danger and also an OPPORTUNITY. (just like the 2 Chinese Characters that makes up the word “Crisis”). Just like today, I learned that the Family is most important and when one member of the family grieves…the other members are alongside and supporting each other all the way.

I wish everyone of you a GREAT 2010…do CELEBRATE the year that has just ended…but look ahead for the New Great Year ahead…filled with Endless Possibilities, Challenges and Victories as well…all rolled in One!

SMILE…and enjoy this journey ahead…LOVE LIFE +LIVE LIFE!

Do you truly want to be successful? November 30, 2009

I recently attended a 2 day Internet Marketing seminar in the City with my close buddy. Initially I was very pessimistic and doubtful about the Quality of the information, presenters and the learning I would receive from this ‘free’ seminar. I even wanted to pull out from it last minute, until my buddy offered to drive me to the event.

I was actually blown away from it and I even invested in a $3000 Online Coaching course! This seminar also opened my eyes to the possibilities of doing business via the Internet like never before. It has also made me a few new friends and opened a few doors for future networking. Have you ever experienced a situation in your life (similar to mine) where you thought it would end up bad but it turned out for the better, plus it became an impetus that changed the course of your life?

It reminds me of the saying…’If you want a different result…try doing something different’. We all are fearful and unsure of anything new, risky, untested, uncommon and unknown. That is why less than 1% of all population in any country have truly tasted REAL SUCCESS! (and at times real failure as well). Think of it this way, there can only be 1 Tiger Woods, 1 Mother Theresa, 1 Billy Graham, 1 Martin Luther King Jr., 1 Suu Kyi, 1 Nelson Mandela, 1 Gandhi, 1 Obama, 1 U2 and 1 Oprah. What makes them stand out from the crowd to become an Icon in their field?

I’d like to say that with all their individual strengths, they all also shared a common thread; they all had a Heart to Believe and the Resilience to Go Against the Flow!

I believe 2010 will be a Defining Year in my life…Why? It’s because I have a DREAM and the DRIVE within me to become ALL that I am intended to be! The only person stopping me right now is the one facing me every morning in the mirror. If you don’t believe me…try it…

Exercise: Think about a Hairy Audacious Goal (or Dream) that you are “fearful” to achieve…

Answer: For some, it’s to Quit their Job, for others it’s to start a Business, yet for some it would be to go back to do an MBA or a PhD…and yet for others is to challenge their Fear over Something or Someone.

Challenge: Will you give yourself the authority to LIVE OUT this Goal (Dream) and be Free to decide your Destiny without anyone (including yourself) stopping you?

Forget about the planning and the step by step process for a moment. You will find yourself rationalizing…if you don’t make a decision today. Do you truly want to be successful? I challenge you to say YES!!!…try it and I guarantee you…2010 and beyond…will never be the same.

 

Take one more step…contact Coach Mel today…for a Free 20mins Coaching Skype Call and he will work with you to take a step forward >> to Live Your Dream! Go to http://www.dvcoaching.com or write to mel@dvcoaching.com

Pride…(In the Name of Love) October 30, 2009

One of the most difficult of words in the English language neither a bombastic word nor a difficult word to spell. In fact it is a word that seems to be the hardest thing to flow out of anyone’s mouth…no matter what the age (from a young rebellious child to a hardened 80 year old man!). It is the word ‘Sorry’. Even Billy Joel seems to agree with that statement through one of his best selling songs.

‘Sorry’…can also be said in many ways, ‘soooo soorry’ (sarcastically) to ‘SORRY’ (in anger) to ‘sorry’ (what dear? I can’t quite hear what you said…). A lot of times, the word sorry gets stuck in between the desire to be Right to the fear of being Wrong  and with a twist of deceit of wanting to keep our Pride (and sometimes Face, too). Yes, we ego-centric people living in this modern microwave society are tongue-tied and bashful to say the least, to admit that it was actually ‘my fault’.

What brave souls of the past, I remember watching a golden favorite, “To Kill a Mockingbird” where the main character (an African man) was accused for a crime that he did not commit. I loved his character…so humble, so gentle and without pride (but faced with tons of prejudice)…and you could see that at one point, he even considered taking on the punishment for a crime he did not commit (which made me think that he was willing to say a Silent Sorry for it).

What makes us hold on to our Pride (even when we are wrong and ought to apologize)? I believe it could be a many things from our past and the environment we grew up to the influences we open ourselves to through the years to the all the “standing for our Rights” movement. We all grew up rebelling in a form or other. Turn on the News today and you can see the same things that plagued Bible times…Sin, Lust, Greed, Jealousy, Anger and Pride.

I have through the years, mellowed from a very hot and short tempered man to an almost even tempered and sometimes sliding to the mild tempered side. I could say I have matured, but I like to believe that I have CHOSEN to CHANGE. I saw the pain I personally put my loved ones through the many years and decided that I have to begin to QUIT IT. Yes…time has been the testimony of the changes I have made…I never gave up but most of all, the people who loved me, did NOT Give Up on me! (that was probably my saving Grace).

In the Name of LOVE…the Love I have for my God, the Love I have for my Wife and Family…I made a shift and after many encounters with the dark-side of reality…I finally see the light and I am truly Blessed and Happy about the Journey…in which I am still learning from…each and every day.

Where are you at today? I urge you to Choose Life and take the Stand to walk away from Pride…the beauty of your decision will become a Flower blossoming into your Destiny.

 

Choices… September 29, 2009

Have you ever been asked to do something that you did not want to do (for starters)…but subsequently said YES to? How did that make you feel? Compliant, Used, Disempowered, Angry, Disappointed…or just plain Dumb? Were you complaining under your breath whilst you carried out that job, role, request, promise or favor?

If you have done that before, you are not alone. But who do you blame? No one…but your good self. I encourage you to take up your responsibility and own up to that decision, as it is all about choices! Sometimes we make good ones and other times we make not so good ones (and we’ll have to face the consequences of making either choices).

Of course there are times when the need arises for us to be selfless and help out…but just as important, there are also times that we need to put ourselves first! Uh-huh, you heard what I just said. If we do not know (appreciate) how to put ourselves first, who else will?

One of my favorite authors and Coach is self-care guru Cheryl Richardson. She shares passionately about creating space and loving yourself enough to make time to care for you! If you allow yourself to be a doormat…you have just given up your right to choose (and allow others to step all over you *thank you*).

There will be times in your life when you need to say NO! Of course with a smile and with grace, it is important to stand your ground to keep your priorities in check and in focus. There is much power and responsibility in the choices that we all make.

Will you be able to stand up and be counted for what you (really want to) say and mean?

• NO = I will not marry you until I see you beginning to commit now…not after the marriage…
• NO = I will not take on more responsibilities even if it means I get new job title and a raise…
  
• NO = I will not accept anything that goes against my morals or values…
• NO = I will not be taken for a ride or for granted and my rights are important…
• YES = I will say yes to more work-life balance starting now not tomorrow…
• YES = I will respect myself more vs. be concerned of what others think of me…
• YES = I will appreciate my strengths and not look down on myself and my inabilities…
• YES = I will agree with doing something for someone because I want to…not because I’m obliged to…
• And the list goes on…

What are some tough decisions that you need to make today? Whatever the choice…be confident and be glad that you are making it…by yourself and for yourself! The more you do this, the greater the results you will experience in your life.

The Busy-Bee August 30, 2009

I’ve been really BUSY like a Bee, with establishing my new Online Coaching business (with my partner Les White)…that I sometimes feel that I’m just getting nowhere. Of course we are getting ready and setting up a Good Foundation for the BIG Time…and YES I can envision Maximum Impact Professionals (MIP) going Global Successfully as well!

But the problem is the current situation.You see…the Busyness of Life (involving Work and Personal Life) can sometimes be an “Illusion” that you are Progressing! It can also make you feel you’re “Worth Something”…being involved, being needed, wanted and feeling important. Plus this can of course give you an “Identity” that might set you up for disaster…especially when people Peg their Identity to their Contribution Purely at Work. And in many cases when they lose their jobs, they subsequently also lose their Identity, Self-Worth and worst of all their Reason for Living!

Don’t get me wrong…I’m all for being Busy and being Committed at your Work and Goals in Life…but if these are eating you up at the Core, then it is not worth it! I’ve met and Coached many who were so Busy that they automatically neglected their responsibilities at Home (to their Partner, Spouse, Children, etc). You might say, they dropped the ball. Unfortunately, many of them did not see that coming or happening…and even some were still ignorant to the fact!

Why? It’s because they linked their Importance, their Sole Motivator and their Actions (Mind, Soul and Body) to just One Aspect that gave them Great Results…in this case their Business, Career or Work. We all live in a Results Oriented society and understand that good performance is always tied with Incentives.

What is your Incentive of Life today? To be Rich or to have a Rich Life?

If you are like me…you would also enjoy being Busy, which is Fantastic! But STOP and think, and begin to Align yourself with your Purposes, Motives, Reasons, Results, Goals, Incentives and START thinking “Balance”. That word has helped me and my Clients tremendously!

What is your Balance Today? Do note that something will always have to Give, as there is an Opportunity Cost to wanting Balance.

• Are you willing to sacrifice not to be so successful?
• Are you willing to go against the flow and sometimes stand on your values?
• Are you willing to sacrifice your promotion or bonus this year for the sake of saving your marriage?
• Are you willing to sacrifice your time from work to watch your daughter dance or son kick the footy?

You know, I never ever heard of someone on their dying bed wanting to CLOSE just one more Sales Deal. If that is the case, why wait to near death to only then…want a change?

The Busy-Bee and the Balance-Bee will both die anyway, why reach there faster?

Choose to be the Balance-Bee today…and I guarantee you will see your life transform!…

Stay or Jump? July 16, 2009

Have you ever been on a Boat Ride that was rocky and bumpy all the way to your destination? I for one do not enjoy a rocky boat ride. There was once I threw up all over the side of the boat whilst it anchored itself in ocean on a fishing trip. I did not manage to fish that day…but I’m sure the fish had a gala time with my “offerings”.

You know…you don’t have to be on any “boat” if you choose otherwise. But you have to realize that once you agree to go for the ride…you are at the mercy of the open waters.

When I coach, I often encounter clients feeling stuck and they often wonder why/how they ended up on a boat (of life) that they did not want to be on, in the first place. They just either went along with it…or just did not think of questioning their decision at that point of time. And hence, I would ask them this; “now that you are on the boat…what do you want to do?“

Realizing that instead of moping around or complain, they soon realize that they have a few choices

• enjoy the journey (smile bravely at the storm?)
• take over the boat (by force or negotiation?) or
• simply get off the boat!

You see…life can sometimes keep us “captive”…but I’m sure when we come to our senses, we know better and acknowledge that we have a choice. Be bold and take that step of faith! I challenge you to make a decision today to step out of your “captivity/prison/comfort zone” and perhaps…jump out of the boat!

What will be your choice today?

A Tribute to Michael Jackson… June 26, 2009

What a shocker of a day…I’ve decided to dedicate this space to MJ…Farah Fawcett…and I’ve just heard Jeff Goldblum (now confirmed a hoax) has passed away as well!

In the entertainment industry…no one has truly come close to the King of Pop Michael. From his early days as a child singing sensation with the Jackson 5…to his debut solo career (that went Off the Wall)…to the  launch to the world with the “Moon Walk” at Motown’s 25th Year Celebration to his all time bestselling album of all time “Thriller”…to his chameleon changing face re-construction (which he denies)…to his court cases…to his almost bankruptcy…to his second or third “HIStoric” comeback …selling 50 Concerts in London!

MJ’s life has created so much buzz and fascination…that we all felt like “we were part of his big circus act” being the spectators looking in to a sad, confused (wacko), eccentric, secluded life of a Mega-Celebrity. But his death will now be the BIGGER buzz…I predict that in days, months, years to come…his death will create such a ripple and renewal of love and adoration to this “elephant-man” (a picture of his emotional state…a simple man behind the mask). He and his franchise will eclipse the likes of great music deads – Jimmy Hendrix, Elvis Presley, John Lennon, Freddy Mercury, Michael Hutchence and many more. Perhaps even a bigger story over Princess Di!?

Michael was my Iconic figure before I knew U2. His songs changed my life…I remember we did a dance performed at a 12th PJ Scouts Campfire with the song “The Way You Make Me Feel”…and yes, I was Michael in the Electric Blue Shirt! That song gave me instant fame with the Girl Guides there…I can’t imagine how Michael feels being this HUGE…bigger than life entertainer that made us laugh, cry, dance, sing and young (forever).

There is much we can learn from these sad events…for me there’s 5;

1. Life is short (What are we doing with our seconds, minutes, hours, days?) – Gone Too Soon…
2. Life is a story (What legacy are we leaving behind?) – Thriller, Bad, Dangerous…
3. Life is a gift (What is our “gift” to our family, friends and larger community?) – Heal the World…
4. Life is special (We are given this ONE chance to make a difference…to make a Change!) – Man in the Mirror…
5. Life is now to be Celebrated (We must LIVE today…and do what we have been “destined to do” and it don’t matter if you are Black or White!)
   

They say DEATH is the Final Frontier (how true)…but I add on to say that Life is that Journey to the Final Frontier. Hence it is more important how we choose to LIVE…are we PASSIONATE about something/anything? I suggest that you simply GO for it! Let go of all chains that are tying you down to your Dreams…make it into a Reality!

I have Coached many people to help them Envision their Dreams…and all I can say is, it has been AMAZING!!! Just seeing their lives get empowered as they uncover their Potential…to all they could be…

LIFE is truly worth the Living!

No Time to… June 18, 2009

Do you think we are actually progressing in our modern life here on earth? Well…in my opinion…it’s a mixed yes and no…for me.

We can fly around world in a few days, buy something from e-bay and get that sent to your doorstep in X-press mail, communicate to a person with an sms in a few seconds (that includes twitter/facebook)…but then again we don’t have time to write long “hand-written” letter anymore, we can multi-task eating dinner/talking to our partner/watching t.v/feeding your child and reading a mag all at once!

We are also prone to having short-term relationships, short conversations, short answers to questions, short emails/sms (using acronyms), short memories, short tempers, short patience at the fast food joint, short church services and a whole lot more!

I came across this wonderful email and I laughed my head off…it’s a scenario if sms was available in Moses’ time…then the 10 Commandments would look something like this;

1. no1 b4 me. srsly.

2. dnt wrshp pix/idols

3. no omg’s

4. no wrk on w/end (sat 4 now; sun l8r)

5. pos ok – ur m&d r cool

6. dnt kill ppl

7. :-X only w/ m8

8. dnt steal

9. dnt lie re: bf

10. dnt ogle ur bf’s m8. or ox. or dnkey. myob.

M, pls rite on tabs & giv 2 ppl.

Did you get that? If you didn’t then perhaps you are still a Backward-techy Baby Boomer trying to understand what sms-es are all about. But seriously, apart from the good Christian message about the Laws (above)…we are all kinda stuck doing life in this very individualistic, self-absorbing, no-time-for-anything-more-than-3-minutes-world!

Imagine if God were to treat us like that…and if we wanted to ask him for a Blessing or Prayer request…He would say, “hmmm…why don’t you please take a number and queue up!”

– Selah (Rest)

Just got back from watching the new movie YEAR ONE (Jack Black)…and it was hilarious. Amidst the story and wacky comedy…was a message, “we’ve gotta find our true self in the midst of all the busyness and to make a real difference”.

As I coach people of all ages and nationalities, I begin to realize that under all the make-up and pretense (that we sometimes have to put up to protect who we really are)…there is that fragile, confused, sensitive, plain-old man and woman! Every single one “almost” identical to each other to the point we are all warm-blooded, courteous/kind, with the ability to smile and laugh…and just wanting/needing some direction, attention, love and affection.

My advice to you today…is to STOP…to take time…to make time…and live your time here on earth to the “Best” of your ability…sharing, laughing, adoring, singing, giving, affirming, forgiving, dancing, dreaming, living and loving!

No time??? Think again…please use it wisely, before it runs out.

The Years Of A Futile Life…(Part 2) June 6, 2009

Welcome back to Part 2 of the “Futile Life”…heck…if all is just wasting away, is it worth it to continue this blog? Why not…let’s continue after all I believe it might just give you an indication of what your life is all about and what you should be looking out for. So…let’s begin.

We live to say…an average of 70+ years on earth and then we leave…hmmm, where do we go? Well firstly not many have traveled back and forth to “live 2 tell”…but if there is some truth in life after death…then one should start seeking and asking some questions;

• What happens after our so called “life”?
• Where do we go or don’t go?
• Do we have a choice on where we go?
• Who actually has come back from the dead (as they said they would)?
• Anyone conquered death, grave and even hell…in history?
• And does anyone currently hold the key to eternal life?

As this point…I will just leave these questions for you to ponder and reflect…and I would seriously suggest that you spend part of your time on earth…searching for the answers and truly finding it then believing it with all of your heart…before the end of this futile life.

Now back to our time spent here on earth…the 70+ years as mentioned…

I have lived 36 of them already (yeah…yeah…I am revealing my age) and WOW that means I have at least another 36 years of life to go! Some might say…having another crack at it or a second chance. Would you like a second chance at life? Have you ever thought of going back in time to amend something you said or did or vice versa? Well you have it folks…each one of us (no matter how old we are) can have a second chance…you hold that in your hands. All you have to do is to say YES to whatever it is that might have held you back and you can BEGIN!

But…but…I’m not qualified, not good enough, not young anymore, not that good at speaking/sharing my heart and thoughts, don’t have enough money, don’t have the opportunity, don’t have the skills nor ability, don’t have the desire or heart…and I have a handicap, I have failed, I have been let down, I have been demoralized, I have been shamed, I have not achieved much in life…and the list of disappointments can go on…and on…and on.

If all you are feeling and saying is like what we highlighted above…you are truly living a Futile Life!

I watched Oprah the other day and she was sharing about the “BIG GIVE” (a Seed $ Idea for Volunteers who want to Make a Difference Growing that $ Exponentially for the under privileged) and learn 2 Key lessons from it;

1. People are the same…all over the world…we are in built with a Heart of Compassion and Purpose
2. The Human Spirit knows NO BOUNDS when there is a VISION Driving them Forward

Where is your “heart-beating-for” at this moment? What is your heart saying for you to do? Is there a Vision for your Future (lost somewhere deep within) that is just waiting and yearning to come out?

What or Who is stopping you then? The probable answers could be well…”Others…my Parents…my Wife…my Friends…my Colleagues…my Closest Buddy…my Pastor…my Siblings… STOP! What about YOU? Are YOU stopping yourself from Living the Life you ought to and think you should be?

You might have read of these stats before…but let me vividly take you through them and you can decide where you stand in the midst of all these;

• More than 3.7 billion people in the world live on less than $2 per day
• More than 2.6 billion people—over 40 per cent of the world’s population—do not have basic water sanitation
• 800+ million people go to bed hungry every day…(300 million are children)
• 584 million women are illiterate
• 114 million children do not get even a basic education
• Every year 11 million children die—most under the age of 5…(6 million due to completely preventable causes like malaria, diarrhea and pneumonia)
• Every minute, a woman somewhere dies in pregnancy or childbirth
• Every 3.6 seconds another person dies of starvation and the large majority are children under the age of 5

Now if I were one of these…my life would really look Futile don’t you think?

So what do you have…that makes your life futile? An Education, Safe Drinking Water, Medicine, Food (3-5 times a day), Two Hands and Two Legs (and all parts of your body functioning properly), Parents and Family that Love you, Money in your bank account (for a Holiday, Investment, Rainy Day), a Car, possibly own a Property, a Job, Shoes, Clothing, Gadgets and the list goes on and on…plus Internet that is how you are reading this Blog ; )

You have a choice…what will be yours today? To live this life the same…OR for the next X number of years ahead, to choose to begin afresh, anew…TODAY! Truly forgetting what’s behind you…the mistakes, the trials, the issues, the failures…look ahead. Go out…”Smell the flowers while you can”…and get excited on the many Possibilities of your Extraordinary short existence…and to live your life again! Learn to smile and be thankful for the many fortunate blessings you ‘already’ have in your life.

I challenge you to make a pact (with yourself)…to write your “own History”…the Pen is in Your Hands! Live your Dreams with Passion…and use the years ahead of you to leave a Legacy for the next generation to aspire towards.

I believe in YOU…so start believing in yourself!